Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Dear Mother Goose

"Dear Mother #$%^-er,

Clearly you are pro-company. Are you anti-labor, anti-all labor, or just anti-NJASAP? Or, are you pro-anything?

Also, where [has your boy] been?

Sincerely,

Angry In Columbus"

Dear Angry,

Since you and a few others put the word "Mother" in your salutation, I have been asked to reply to your email and the six similar ones my daughter received since knowledge of QSG hit the scuttle boards.

First, the Golden Goose is a girl - a queen, actually. It would be hard for "My Boy" to lay eggs as my boy is a rooster and the subject of other nursery rhymes. She has been on a well-earned vacation and will be back tomorrow and will continue with her pleas for truth. She has developed a list of questions for yout that may help both of you (you and her). Since your other question is somewhat urgent, I sent her an email and here is her reply:

"Hi Mom,

Thanks for the heads-up. Let them know that I actually love pilots. Not only AM I one, but I have carmal knowledge of several of them (Honk Honk). I am not pro-company, I am 'pro-me'! See, regardless of who is managing the company or managing the labor groups our fates are tied, and sealed together. A good management team in each organization means a healthy me and more golden eggs. I am not anti-anything, except like all living things - I fight infection, and I have Lupees real bad. I am laying fewer and fewer golden eggs and soon I may stop laying them all together. You know what farmer Warren will do after that: shrink me down until I am nice and lean and 'whack'!

I have loved many managers, and loved many union managers, and many - like bad colds, have come and gone. This too, shall pass, but only if I get some help. I feel like I have one of those flesh-eating viruses that can't be beat by conventional medicine. All I ever wanted was for all of my precious fellow pilots to take an interest, a real interst, in my well-being.

Oh Mom, I am rambling. Tell them that I love them all, and just need some help getting the hands that have been wrapped around my neck just a little loose, so I can breathe. Some air will help me either get over or learn to live with my Lupees. And ask them to read the archives - some of my best stuff is from April! Regardless of what may come, let them know that we will always have Paris, and Columbus, and Miami, and Chicago, and that time we met with the Marquis guys and had drinks, and (blush) that weekend we were snowed in at HPN. My, my feathers are a sunder just thinking of it.

Love you,

QSG

Honk It Momma!"

Friday, May 20, 2011

Eno-Eno-Ruof goes Country Western


His part of the Eno-Eno-Ruof has both types of music: Country and Western.

In the common-sense section, an NJASAP board member sings a little bit country by saying that each board member has a specific duty. He does go on to give a nice factual breakdown of three issues. These are clear signs of a Lupee Zombie having a lucid moment and making sense. It makes my gold-laying glands all tingly.

§       2007 Amended Agreement §28.6 discusses the requirement of the Company to send shutdown messages to pilots at the end of every duty day.

Good info, but also consider – gasp – honk – egg – CALLING IN to confirm your status.

 §       28.3(E)(5) says voluntarily completing a static demo will be considered Administrative Duty.

Again – good facts, but one-sided advice. Do you have more than one or two stripes? THEN CALL and KEEP CALLING until your DO can solve the problem. That airplane ain’t goin’ anywhere (it be static) – so why are you working the message board instead of working proper channels……. Unless…… early onset Lupees???

§       Sections 28.3(E)(5) and 23.10

All three of these write-ups beg for common-sense, but the last one gets to the point. Remember “1-800-ACP?” The time has come to TRY to escalate a problem and get it resolved in real time through professional interaction with the team that supports us in the flight center. If that fails, then continue to escalate until we hit the corporate brick wall. If that fails, try and find a union volunteer that is Lupee-free. If that fails, the take your chances with one of the Zombies. Somewhere in there it is a good idea to file a grievance – NetJets tends to settle the ones filed by individuals, when they have merit. Merit means a NetJets team member made a mistake and wants to make us whole. Without merit is when a Lipeeite files a political flaming bag of animal waste and intends to let the stink fester on the docket until it gets enough attention.



In the changing attitudes section, the continued “Dey are not wissening to meeeeeeee” whining bellows on in what seems like a Western music ballad. Rather than write-up a song for you, I ask you to quickly read the section and “honk” when you see opinion and FUD instead of factual reporting. Read it and honk it fast enough and it’s a geni-ine honkey-tonk foot-stomper. Also, checking in on the Pygmalian Effect post below will help.

Honkey-Tonk Honk It!

QSG

Is that a Lupee up my backside? NEWS & UPDATES



Dateline: Honkers, UT
Negotiations Update for May 13, 2011...Lupee’s Zombies continued to evade any attempt to sign a reasonable confidentiality agreement. This will allow them to retreat to full sniper mode and attempt to call into question everything NetJets does without having access to information. This is sensible safe harbor for any union, since they will then flood the company with a ridiculous number of letters that can all be answered – only with a confidentiality agreement – and then turn around and claim that the company is fully ignoring them. All the while hoping you forget that they cancelled the agreements that had been in place for YEARS. So I ask you, aviators, what does Lupee and his zombies have to hide? What have they done? Professional Flight Attendants and Maintenance Technicians don’t even behave this way – and they all have Teamsteritis.

Company safety officials to join NJASAP representatives in DallasNJASAP continues to twist the truth and lie by omission. In last week’s Eno-Eno-Ruof they left out one small detail that the Goose has confirmed: NetJets participants were working on their schedule and making sure the day-to-day needs of the department could be covered before committing to go, and had communicated such. What gives? Oh well, maybe the big, commodity air lines will have something to learn from how we can apply best practices in the on-demand world to our exclusive customers. Not that they are different or anything.

Pilots urged to report instances of waste … This is truly comical. How will NJASAP provide a report if they don’t meet? Can we trust our confidential information to a team that won’t agree to a basic confidentiality agreement? Will my idea be leveraged against my employer? Will my idea be used to unionize other groups – like my dues money – and actually harm my employer? Will my idea have credibility if it is carried forward by a Lipeeite? I am going to think more about the common-sense section above and the self-fulfilling prophecy section below before I give the Lupee zombies anything else besides the dues money I am legally required to provide. Yes I will call 1-800-ACP. Thanks!

Honk!

QSG

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

WASHINGTON WATCH - DAY 1

Is that like when you pay big money in dues and the President doesn't show up? Or is that like when the Duty to Fairly Represent people goes unfulfilled?

Honk?

QSG

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

European Affairs / Leafy and Timbo Go To Washington

Are you sleeping with the enemy?
Or is he in Europe this week, telling Skyshare she looks hot.

Victory for NJE pilots continues
Additional information shared regarding separation buy-out and inflated cost to pilots due to Santulli-Era Hiring
Prepared by Vice President of Industry Affairs Captain Leafy

NJE pilots from Skyshare, the association created by the pilots of NetJets Europe, expect final certification from European authorities in the upcoming weeks. Meanwhile, significant developments within the NetJets European division continue. Our efforts to spend your dues money strengthening the pilot group that will ultimately compete for your jobs continues in earnest.

NJE offered voluntary separation packages to the pilots last month and will be closing the window this month. The package includes 15 months of full pay to pilots who volunteer to resign their positions and includes pilots on leave programs as well as pilots in the Ab Initio program at Oxford, England, approximately 50 of whom have never seen the inside of a NetJets aircraft. NJE management has neither shared the criteria it will use to determine which applications will be accepted nor have they indicated how many they need or how many pilots have applied. The Company has stated they reserve the right to award or reject the buyouts on a “case-by-case” basis. It appears the projected return of pilots from leaves of absence may be what is driving the Company’s latest offer, which could easily end up costing millions of Euros. Clearly this indicates a soft market in Europe, and an aggressive attempt to eliminate costly jobs through a large, one-time expense. Twenty million Euros this year to avoid carrying one hundred Euros over five years is pretty sharp. If we are really good, we can jump on the bandwagon, write down the company notes, and package it to you in a week or two as though it was our idea! Victory!

Meanwhile, the only hole in our scope clause remains – international flying. But who cares about that? Heck, you probably haven’t EVER read your contract and count on Lupee to tell you what it means. Surely we would not be spending your dues money to get European pilots a contract so that they can bargain to take your international flying away. Why would we do that? Where are the globals being delivered? What happened to NJI? Has our behavior as business partners proven us worthy of trust? Tune in this summer to see the results.

Also, Timbo and I are off to Washington DC to stonewall over subcontracting by not signing confidentiality agreements. Here is the schedule:

Wednesday: Lupee is not there
Thursday: Lupee is not there
Friday: Lupee is not there

If we play our cards right, Berkshire Hathaway will farm all the big flying out to NJE, who we helped to organize, and turn NJA into a card program. Because we all know big Kenny D can operate 32 owners per airplane, no problem bro – he and Lupee will be on the same boat smokin’ a cigar in your honor.

All my best,

Danno

[After they give all my golden eggs to NJE, we'll always have Woodbridge.

Honk it!
Goldie G]

Day-Of Parroty: Atchoo-it to English Translation

"Dey r not wissening to me!"

Day-of Issues Report (this one may actually be interpreted as an issue affecting day-of flying, as opposed to the typical dog and pony show to feed the message board mob:
CONTRACT (also known as COLLECTIVE bargaining AGREEMENT) ADMINISTRATION UPDATE
Prepared by NJASAP Vice President of Contract Administration Capt. (Semi-retired) Atchoo-it
At the time of this writing, 62 grievances have been filed year to date. While this may not seem like a large number of violations of the 2007 Amended Agreement (CBA) given the size of our operation, it is indicative of a larger problem of union leadership erosion when one digs a bit deeper. I for one can plainly see how if it were not for paid union representatives filing grievances, the trend would be better compliance by NetJets and an increased number of exceptions to the contract made in favor of the pilots. Consider the following statistics:

§         2010: A total of 72 grievances were filed – four of which were Class Action Grievances (CAG).
§         2009: A total of 56 grievances were filed – four of which were CAGs.
Pop Quiz: Can you guess how many of these were filed by paid union reps? What percentage? If you guessed, “almost all” then you would be right!

Also consider that of the 62 grievances filed year to date (YTD), 10 of those are CAGs, concerning major violations of training and scheduling issues.

Pop Quiz: What is the definition of “major”? If the esteemed Vice President of Contract Administration and two highly paid in-house lawyers do not know the difference between a major dispute and a minor dispute, I might beginning to wonder how my dues money is being spent. If you want to have some fun, grab a beer and drink every time you suspect an exaggeration or editorialized comment designed to create fear, uncertainty, and doubt. If the offense is so horrible that a five-year-old can tell he is being lied to, honk like a goose.

2011 Class Action Grievance Summary (YTD)
106-11      
 Flight Data Recording
110-11      
 Adequacy/Standardization
111-11      
 Duty Day Length/Lunch
112-11      
 Combined Training: 15-Day
127-11      
Combining Transition/Recurrent Training
128-11      
UTC Notification
129-11      
Required Days off; Combined Training Event
130-11     
Improper Notification of Crewmember Schedule Change
131-11      
Modification of Crewmember Schedules
153-11      
Unscheduled Rest Period

This clearly illustrates a disturbing trend in the current management's attitude (drink) toward respecting the terms and conditions jointly negotiated in the 2007 CBA. To be clear, § 21: Grievance Procedure and § 22: System Board of Adjustment are designed to handle minor disputes that would arise while operating under the current CBA. Correct! There are simply times when there will be disagreements over interpretation and implementation. However, the issues giving rise to these grievances are not new with respect to uncharted territory. These are simply violations of long standing practices in place since implementation of the 2007 CBA. With that in mind, one has to wonder, “What is their motivation?” (HONK!) My motivation is to get you to continue funding my time off so I don’t have to fly. Have you actually read the grievances? Have you read the contract? Atchoo-it is counting on you having done neither.

This situation gets even more disturbing upon closer examination. (Drink) For some time now, the CBA Administration Team has been operating with a grievance vetting process in place in which a large number of grievance submissions are resolved prior to a formal filing with the Company. This would require me to act in good faith, and Lupee has promised me that if I act in good faith then I will have to go fly the line more. Also, consider the number of potential grievance situations buffered by the SOD and various committees that handle the day-to-day issues of scheduling, training and duty. These situations are not resolved by the magical powers of paid union representatives or volunteer committee members, but instead represent huge cooperation between NetJets and NJASAP – something that we are counting on you not noticing because bug, complicated paragraphs like this are not exciting or salacious. These actions of cooperation between flight operations and stewards and the LMRP program greatly reduced the number of grievances that would have otherwise been filed, and yet filings are rising sharply. Simply put, the grievance numbers represent only a fraction of the increasing erosion of the respect that business leaders, including the board of Berkshire Hathaway, have for NJASAP leaders, and cause me to stop and thank both God and the Goose that at least trained non-puppeteer stewards and LMRP committee members know how to work around political infighting and anti-business socialist agendas.

We are well aware of reduced staffing levels in many departments (drink) that have daily interactions with crewmembers. We are also aware of a number of new employees who are not yet up to speed in their knowledge of the CBA and its applicability to daily scheduling and duty issues (drink). We are also well aware of my inability to substantiate the previous two statements other than to rely on anecdotal evidence. Surely mistakes will be made; however, when the basics of many of these violations have been covered over and over in the minor dispute resolution process for many years, why do they continue to happen (drink)? More importantly, why are they happening with increasing frequency (drink)? Is it a lack of proper training of NJA staff members (drink)? Is it a directive from senior administrators to get the job done however necessary (drink)? Or, could it be something deeper in the philosophy of the current management team as a whole (drink)? [Okay, I know I am getting a little tipsy, but was that five or six unanswered rhetorical questions? Maybe we should send people over to NetJets for biweekly business briefings. Oh yeah, we did that, and they don’t even take notes, because they don’t care about the business, just their privileged, supplemental paid positions.]

Regardless of the reasons, the degeneration of the relationship between NetJets senior management and NJASAP since the departure of Richard Santulli is stark and troubling. (Honk!) I want you to know I am willing to forget how Santulli treated us like horses for ten years and basically kicked our butts by keeping slave wages in place for the better place of a decade. If we try real hard, we can bring him back. The issues giving rise to increased grievance filings are symptoms of a more systemic problem. When one considers all of these CBA violations fall well within the control of NetJets management and most have never been a problem in the past, it compels one to question the Company's commitment to abide by the Agreement they signed with NJASAP in 2007. (HONK!) I am sure that since you do not read the contract it is easy to make you forget that I control the arbitration docket. Also, I am counting on you not knowing that NJASAP would not take anything I think will lose to arbitration. In other words, if we don’t move the docket, we admit that our CAGs have no merit, are a waste of your dues money, and are used as hollow, fluffy little leverage pillows. (HONK! HONK! HONK!) Please stay asleep. We know what to do with your money when you trust us blindly and prove us correct – the ultimate theory that NJASAP subscribes to – you are drones, idiots, and cannot think for yourself.

With the increase in grievance filings and decrease in resolutions, it is evident we will be required to arbitrate these matters to ensure CBA compliance from a management team who is either unwilling or uncommitted to honoring the provisions to which it previously agreed. Click here to view the current Arbitration Docket. The panel of arbitrators is being struck, and dates are being narrowed down for individual cases. While there is always the chance of resolution prior to arbitration – something with which we have been successful with previous management teams – the likelihood of such progress is slim under the current circumstances, and NJASAP holds little hope of such success. This is not to say we would not welcome such an opportunity; however, our recent success at this has been nil. Our only problem with this strategy is that we will surely lose our cases and the truth will be revealed. Stand by for a lack of progress on the calendar dates that we control.

Last Day Off Messages  Crewmembers are briefed their duty day has ended by receiving an off message; they are expected to be on duty until such time as an off message is received. The number of times crewmembers are being returned to their HBAs or crew bases without receiving an off message is on the rise. Because I cannot provide you with any data, you will have to take my word for it. Although this issue has been brought to the Company's attention numerous times via the grievance process, the lack of last day off messages continues to be a problem. (drink) Recently, there have been several instances in which crewmembers who have not received a shut off message have called in to be shut off and were given an off time only for Company personnel to go back into IJet at a later date to change the off time to the actual time of airline arrival at the pilot’s HBA or crew base. (drink) There are currently several grievances open on this issue. More on this matter will be provided in the next 411 by NJASAP Trustee Capt. F. Reakout, who is working the issue with the Company, or rather, not working the issue due to attitude degradation. Once again, remain asleep, you will have o take my word for it.

Rental Car Briefs  Section 28.3(C)(3) Rental Car Travel Duty is very clear. It states: “Rental Car Travel Duty is Company-directed travel in a rental car. Rental Car Travel Duty begins thirty (30) minutes prior to the scheduled departure time unless the crewmember previously completed the process of renting the car in which case, duty begins as directed by the Company. Rental car trips will not be scheduled to exceed one hundred fifty (150) miles or four (4) hours using MapQuest’s “Shortest Distance” or “Shortest Time” functions. A crewmember may refuse a Rental Car Travel Duty assignment for any safety-related reason, including lack of familiarity with route; provided, the crewmember contacts his Chief Pilot or his designee as soon as possible to provide notification of the refusal. Rental Car Travel Duty ends at the latter of scheduled or actual arrival time at the Company-designated location, based on MapQuest, plus thirty (30) minutes.”

The intent of this language is very matter of fact, leading one to believe preventing a violation would be fairly (drink)obvious. That has not been the case: More than 13 grievances have been filed on this very issue, including a “cease and desist” order rendered by the System Board of Adjustment (SBA) on March 14, 2007, regarding Grievance #1622-06. The four-member panel even went so far as to state the Company could, in fact, query a crewmember's willingness to exceed the limitation prior to scheduling a rental car in excess of 150 miles. At that time, any ambiguity should have been eliminated; however, that has not been the case as escalating remedies of $150, $200 and $250 donations to the NetJets Family Foundation for each violation have taken place. Given the thousands of rental cars ordered each year, this .001% error rate is astounding, to-wit, and thusly must be admonished in the wordiest of terms possible.

The next step in the process to resolve this reoccurring matter is to let an arbitrator execute the cease and desist order rendered by the SBA. This is very unfortunate, considering something as simple as a post-it note on a computer screen of those who schedule rental cars could easily fix the issue. But again, one has to wonder if saving a dollar on airline travel is the motivating factor of such blatant (drink) negligence, CBA be damned. (HONK! HONK! Well put me in diapers and call me Hansell or Gretel) What other motivations would allow this to continue? Likely the lack of willingness for me or my boss to take a losing case to arbitration. Just sayin’.

GV F/O Bid Postings & Awards  The recent posting of the GV F/O bid awards presents another situation in which the Company demonstrated its unwillingness to work with NJASAP prior to violating the CBA. (drink) This decision is ironic (drink) as this is not the first time a bid posting for GV F/Os have gone unfilled. Even with that, they immediately posted another bid for these positions that also went unfilled. As a result, Vice President of Contract Compliance Mark Okey and I exchanged numerous email and engaged in several telephone conversations to discuss the situation, which would ultimately be elevated to NJASAP President Mark Luthi and NJA President Shane Eyer. I hope it impresses you that I can actually refer to Mr. Eyer according to appropriate rank and title. Our position was clear from the beginning (drink): Although LOA 01-013 did not address moving into a GV aircraft from any fleet other than the GIV, we were willing to discuss how this could be done. It was evident to us that unless a new LOA was in place, there would be potential harm created by filling the GV bids from seat locked and non-GIV crewmembers. We discussed this with the Company repeatedly, and yet the results of the last bid award clearly show how the Company chose to handle the issue. Once again, CBA be damned. (HONK!) Once again, I spin for you an anecdotal, inflammatory tale without any evidence of paper exchanged. Of course, do get an agreement, my boss would have to come off the boat, off the organizing campaign trail, and actually engage in respectful debate.

At this time, I will not provide additional details on this issue as it is still being discussed; however, you can expect more information to be shared at the appropriate time, such as after we execute confidentiality agreements. Wait a second. We cancelled the loosest agreements in the history of labor relations and now insist on being able to operate without any accountability for the protection of proprietary data. Hold that thought, back up, I’ll be back to you after the next NJASAP leadership election.

These examples are but a few of the issues that have increased in recent months. Please read the grievances that I am other paid union reps file, and the pattern will become clear:  can’t communicate at the table, can’t communicate by letter, phone, or e-mail, try abuse of the minor dispute process. Always too complex for you lazy bones to keep up with. Grievances filed by section are provided below:

2Q11 SBA  The 2Q11 System Board session has been scheduled for May 10 and 11 in Columbus. NJASAP representatives, who will meet to review the cases on May 9, will include myself and Compliance Committee member Pedro Leroux, and Committee chair Joe Lavati will serve as presenter. The current docket includes nine cases. Wow, nine. I hope we can make it though that. We only have a week off the line to do it all.

Ultimately, the responsibility of contract compliance rests with each and every one of you. It should be obvious that nine (9) grievances require three pilots to be off the line on your dime for a week. Our CBA is only as strong as our willingness to enforce its provisions. Can’t you read between the lines here? Just as we have rules and regulations to which we are expected to adhere and operate our aircraft, so too is NetJets expected to abide by our agreement – the 2007 Amended Agreement and associated LOAs – and its conditions. Scope, schedules, duty and rest, basing, seniority and wages are but a few of the staples of our CBA with which you should be familiar. But you won’t take the time, just come to the union meetings and let us tell you what to think. The CBA and associated documents can be easily accessed from the NJASAP Web site and NJASAPConnect. Do not hesitate to request a hard copy from the Compliance Committee if you have lost or misplaced your Agreement, but don’t read it, let us have all the power.
We have electronic grievance filing. Please file grievances. Help us keep our foot on the goose’s neck.

As always, you have many resources you can utilize to keep you sharp and knowledgeable on all contractual matters and how they affect you and your working conditions. But don’t use them except to file grievances. The NJASAP Stewards Council, all NJASAP committees and members and, of course, the CBA Administration Team, including Compliance and SBA are ready, willing and able to assist you kill the golden goose. Feel free to contact any one of us whenever the need to strike out in anger because you cannot bring yourself to speak with an ACP arises.

Hugs, Kisses, and Supplemental-Paid Best Wishes,

Captain Atchoo-it

[Dwink baby, dwink! Soon all me gold be gone! HONK-HONK!

QSG]

I have Lupees

[This is a Lupee-to-English Translation. Achooit and Leafy translations to follow.]

FROM THE ELECTED BY A SLIM MARGIN OF ULTRA-LOW VOTER TURNOUT UNION PRESIDENT

Dear Crewmember, as opposed to pilot, for use in communication to Flight Attendants:

I recognize the selfless service of all military personnel – active, reserve, former and retired. This is because if I can pull at your heart strings, the rest of this extremely one-sided and lie-by-omission message will seem to have more credibility.

It is my privilege to work alongside those of you who have made such remarkable sacrifices in pursuit of the ideals and defense of our great nation. Of course, to do so would require that I actually fly once in a while so that I can tell the difference between what the pilots want and what is wanted by the slim minority of message board cowboys who elected me . . .wait – never mind. Please accept my sincerest gratitude for the sacrifices you make so that we live in a country where I can keep the goose on life support as long as possible, given my business skill level and interest in maintaining a viable source of income. Let freedom ring!

Separately, as discussed in previous letters, NJASAP has set the stage for what will be required to move forward with NetJets in the context of negotiating any modification to §1: Scope, of course, I will have to agree to a base level of confidentiality – something to which I have decided to refuse to do. See, without having to maintain confidentiality I can say and do whatever I want to try to bring about the downfall of people that will not give me what I want – no matter what the cost. More specifically, we provided a list of seven issues that must be resolved before the parties can engage in good faith bargaining, never you mind the irony that this in and of itself is viewed as childish bad-faith. Although the parties met last week, little progress was made. This is probably because I refuse to participate, as my schedule of organizing other groups with your dues money is much to demanding to attend to your affairs.

Whether that will change is difficult to say as I have yet to receive any indication we can make strides toward reaching common ground. This is likely due to the fact that my actions have lost me and my team all credibility with every management team I have ever met with. By comparison, David Sokol looks like a saint and I fully understand his frustration with me.

Continued fixation on cost controls – regardless of its impact on flight operations – has not changed.  Indeed, to wit, and thusly, the fact that NetJets has carried 300-400 pilots as a good faith gesture to me as an olive branch to collaborate on growth strategies, I have decided it’s best to risk it all and shove the olive branch up their backsides. Don’t worry everyone, Griz would have done much worse. I am the lesser of two evils. Stay on the couch and play your video games and watch your Deep Space Nine episodes – “we’ll” take care of you, “brother”.

Where we would have previously attempted to elevate situations like the aforementioned in a less formal manner, the complete lack of success in accomplishing anything substantive makes us reluctant to do so at this time. In fact, the Company’s refusal to address such matters outside of the minor dispute resolution process has compelled NJASAP to refrain from bringing even the most minor issues to their attention. For example, I am shocked that the chairman of three Berkshire Hathaway companies did not engage on the hot button issue of surveillance cameras at FBOs during our first meeting. The way I apply the fine art of shaking hands and then later bending the truth in my communications has gotten us virtually everything we ever wanted – including a backlog of class-action grievances filed primarily by paid union representatives. The best part is that I and I alone control the backlog to a process that we bargained for but refuse to use, because YOU CAN’T LOSE A MERITLESS GREIVANCE IF YOU DON’T TAKE IT TO ARBITRATION. It just gets to live forever as fluffy leverage. God bless the U.S. of A. and due process.


As events continue to unfold in the aftermath of former CEO David Sokol’s resignation, I can only hope the Company will seek to change the way it does business and to recommit to working with NJASAP in a more productive, mutually beneficial manner. Yes, change my diaper and give me everything the message board maniacs want. Maybe I can get elected to another term on my boat.

Even though collaboration has come to a standstill, NJASAP will not renege on its commitment to remaining available to provide assistance and resources to NetJets as appropriate (except me, I will not be there). Volunteers, I command you to not be insulted by how I dismiss all your efforts as meaningless. Of course, if you would only follow my war plan to attack every discrepancy between us until I get what I want then you too could have it all: rank, title, supplemental pay, time off the schedule. That’s how this works.

On a final note, in recent week, the Union and Company have exchanged a number of correspondence, all of which are available in the NJASAP Message Board Briefing Room for member review. ­I strongly recommend you print up all my letters. I have been told that you can easily track when I am off my medication.

Fraternally (you did not ask for it, but I am your BROTHER),

Capt. (Semi Retired) Lupee

[Save me. This guy is killing me. See you in the unemployment line.

Honk!

QSG]

Saturday, May 7, 2011

Early Review

Lupees to English translation of yesterday's 411 to follow later today.
~ including special compliance puppet show review ~

Honk honk honk honk honk-hooooonk!

QSG

Friday, May 6, 2011

Where's the weekly Kool-Aid?

Keep Squeezing, Nuts!

Chugahonk-honk!

QSG

NJASAP View of Confidentiality

"Shhhh. I read in the union newsletter that we are trading in a fleet of airplanes and the owners have not all been notified and are really pissed. The trade-in value on that model dropepd 20% the next day. Don't worry, the company trusts our Lupee to manage information professionally."

Shhhhhhonk!

QSG

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Viewer Mail

"Dear Goose Crap,
My Union Speaks for me. They will eat you alive like hungry TIGERS!"
~ Not a Fan"

Dear Not a Fan:

I am glad you pay dues so they can speak for you. This is what your tigers look like when they communicate the way they do (in their own interests), especially right after payroll has sent them the big fat dues check from all that automatic deduction stuff you do. Nice job!

Honk!

QSG


Not that they're cowardly little pussy cats or anything. It takes courage and heart to do business that's good for everyone. But I forgive you - you had no choice, right? See you at the petting zoo!

Eno-Eno-Ruof Review: "I Have Lupees" Edition

The NJobs After Silly Avoidance of Partnership 411
Friday, April 29, 2001 Edition
Reviewed

Paragraph #
Deception
Reality

Lupees Letter:

(Remember, you have to have the 1-1-4 in your hand so you can read it and compare to this review. If you record it with an mp3 player and play it backwards, it sings "Joy, Joy, Joy, Collectin' Yer Dues" in the same key as the above video.)

1. Dinner with Owners
Names, names, names
So, broadcasting owner names without permission. That's good faith business and common-sense confidentiality. Where is the disclosure of swag? If Dichter was there, there was swag. Should I check Timbos Ebay account or wait for the DOL LM Forms to be completed?

2. Attendees
Wrong information
So if our association can't even get names and titles right, what else are they missing? What am I paying money for?

3. Open dialogue
Examples?
No examples? 

4. CEO will meet with us soon
Definitive statement of future meeting.
Meeting? What meeting? You can be sure a CEO will not even respond to an invitation without a sound confidentiality agreement in place, otherwise meetings are just grab-ass events where you get to spin spin spin the meaning of the event as a result of useless banter. That seems to be a consistent theme here.

5. Bargaining
Aired concerns during pilot briefings.
I just attended recurrent two months ago and it was a Q & A. Instead of being shouted down, attacked on the union message board, and intimidated by stipened thugs at FBOs, we asked questions, and got answers. They gave up personal time to stay afterward and were even willing to admit wrong-doing in several cases. Who represents who around here?

6. Enumerated list: (Number, please reference the fish wrapper, reality)

#1 Confidentiality
Why not? So you can bend and twist the truth and continue to pass along info to the competition in Europe and Cleveland? That's right, supporting overseas NetJets and Flight Options pilots is more of a threat to my flying than anything you have identified since being elected.

#2 Furlough Clarification
We are overstaffed. Sokol is gone. We have no golden-boy sponsoring our sell-more-shares-than-we-can-support "Marquis 2.0" business plan. When BRK comes and looks us over a second time they will find you and Eyer babbling nonsensically. I have put my application in at American Eagle because if I were Warren, I'd order a furlough of 600 more right now. Get a grip and start acting like you represent pilots.

#3 Early outs
That will go over great with everyone else. Keep acting the way you are and enough senior and junior people will man the lifeboats all by themselves.

#4 Leaves of absence
See #4. PS This is not Europe, never was, never will be. Dork.

#5 Recording phone calls
So, years ago you wanted it, then you didn't, now you do again. I am sure they will be really happy to record the calls - they will be able to gather evidence and fire the jackasses that don't know their airplanes and can't communicate like professionals. That would solve our overstaffing problem by a hundred or so. Of course, you would have to go fly the line for us to have the ultimate improvement in professionalism.

#6 Logbooks
LMRP - Done. Read your own reports. It's been part of the plan for a year. Great job.

# 7 Training
See #6. Why on earth would they not want your hand-chosen disruptors in their meetings? I dunno, let me review your communications merry-go-round....

Distance learning LOA back on table? So you cancelled the letter where you cancelled that part of the contract? Did I miss something?

7. Timko and Lieff go to Washington
Who's who going to bargain.
This is clearly a waste of dues. Show me a union president that has signed a confidentiality agreement, actually shows up, is prepared to conduct mutually beneficial business, and I'll show you dues money at work. When is the next presidential election? I guess until then I will have to wait for more merry-go-round sniper rounds and dove tails shot from the bow of the presidential sail boat. How much of that is funded by my dues? The union priorities are clearly wrong. Clear out your damn class action grievance backlog, show up at the table and try, just try, to improve/save NetJets, save the golden goose?

8. Safety meeting
Witch hunt.
Seriously? An invitation to collaborate turned into a one-sided witch-hunt?

9. Safety culture
Just Culture?
Compare the Goose to any other culture, OR just go out and fly a bit.

10. Trip to American and Southwest
Trip to other airlines.
Airlines? Will all the airline pilots please stand up?


Timbo Letter:
Safe and professional
Could not agree more.


I see. Open the contract and make all schedules Wednesday only. Then fight like hell for the message board idiots to make every other Wednesday off. See you all in the unemployment line.

Hnk. Hnk.

QSG



You Spin Me Right Round Baby Right Round

Fellow Flyers:

I have been reading NJASAP's communications lately. I went back and printed off several weeks of 411s and noticed something consistent. They are all very inconsistent. Also, the union president can't seem to get anything done. Could it be he is more interested in himself and his own aspirations and goals of unionizing other groups using my dues? It just seems like a blame-game merry-go-round that will never end.

Which one is Mark? I can't tell, the merry-go-round is moving so fast!

Me thinks he protesteth too much!

Question: Will the illustrious sail boat captain be in Washington DC trying to solve a major issue or will he stay behind to frame up more chitlin-lased kill-the-goose fear, uncertainty, and fantastic tripe?

In other words, he seems to be full of more goose crap that I ever was! Honk! Honk!

QSG