FROM THE ELECTED BY A SLIM MARGIN OF ULTRA-LOW VOTER TURNOUT UNION PRESIDENT
Dear Crewmember, as opposed to pilot, for use in communication to Flight Attendants:
I recognize the selfless service of all military personnel – active, reserve, former and retired. This is because if I can pull at your heart strings, the rest of this extremely one-sided and lie-by-omission message will seem to have more credibility.
It is my privilege to work alongside those of you who have made such remarkable sacrifices in pursuit of the ideals and defense of our great nation. Of course, to do so would require that I actually fly once in a while so that I can tell the difference between what the pilots want and what is wanted by the slim minority of message board cowboys who elected me . . .wait – never mind. Please accept my sincerest gratitude for the sacrifices you make so that we live in a country where I can keep the goose on life support as long as possible, given my business skill level and interest in maintaining a viable source of income. Let freedom ring!
Separately, as discussed in previous letters, NJASAP has set the stage for what will be required to move forward with NetJets in the context of negotiating any modification to §1: Scope, of course, I will have to agree to a base level of confidentiality – something to which I have decided to refuse to do. See, without having to maintain confidentiality I can say and do whatever I want to try to bring about the downfall of people that will not give me what I want – no matter what the cost. More specifically, we provided a list of seven issues that must be resolved before the parties can engage in good faith bargaining, never you mind the irony that this in and of itself is viewed as childish bad-faith. Although the parties met last week, little progress was made. This is probably because I refuse to participate, as my schedule of organizing other groups with your dues money is much to demanding to attend to your affairs.
Whether that will change is difficult to say as I have yet to receive any indication we can make strides toward reaching common ground. This is likely due to the fact that my actions have lost me and my team all credibility with every management team I have ever met with. By comparison, David Sokol looks like a saint and I fully understand his frustration with me.
Continued fixation on cost controls – regardless of its impact on flight operations – has not changed. Indeed, to wit, and thusly, the fact that NetJets has carried 300-400 pilots as a good faith gesture to me as an olive branch to collaborate on growth strategies, I have decided it’s best to risk it all and shove the olive branch up their backsides. Don’t worry everyone, Griz would have done much worse. I am the lesser of two evils. Stay on the couch and play your video games and watch your Deep Space Nine episodes – “we’ll” take care of you, “brother”.
Where we would have previously attempted to elevate situations like the aforementioned in a less formal manner, the complete lack of success in accomplishing anything substantive makes us reluctant to do so at this time. In fact, the Company’s refusal to address such matters outside of the minor dispute resolution process has compelled NJASAP to refrain from bringing even the most minor issues to their attention. For example, I am shocked that the chairman of three Berkshire Hathaway companies did not engage on the hot button issue of surveillance cameras at FBOs during our first meeting. The way I apply the fine art of shaking hands and then later bending the truth in my communications has gotten us virtually everything we ever wanted – including a backlog of class-action grievances filed primarily by paid union representatives. The best part is that I and I alone control the backlog to a process that we bargained for but refuse to use, because YOU CAN’T LOSE A MERITLESS GREIVANCE IF YOU DON’T TAKE IT TO ARBITRATION. It just gets to live forever as fluffy leverage. God bless the U.S. of A. and due process.
As events continue to unfold in the aftermath of former CEO David Sokol’s resignation, I can only hope the Company will seek to change the way it does business and to recommit to working with NJASAP in a more productive, mutually beneficial manner. Yes, change my diaper and give me everything the message board maniacs want. Maybe I can get elected to another term on my boat.
Even though collaboration has come to a standstill, NJASAP will not renege on its commitment to remaining available to provide assistance and resources to NetJets as appropriate (except me, I will not be there). Volunteers, I command you to not be insulted by how I dismiss all your efforts as meaningless. Of course, if you would only follow my war plan to attack every discrepancy between us until I get what I want then you too could have it all: rank, title, supplemental pay, time off the schedule. That’s how this works.
On a final note, in recent week, the Union and Company have exchanged a number of correspondence, all of which are available in the NJASAP Message Board Briefing Room for member review. I strongly recommend you print up all my letters. I have been told that you can easily track when I am off my medication.
Fraternally (you did not ask for it, but I am your BROTHER),
[Save me. This guy is killing me. See you in the unemployment line.
Honk!
QSG]
